Clean Up on Aisle Three

I am standing in the grocery store on an ordinary Tuesday in October, list in one hand, phone in the other. Like most people, I do not enjoy grocery shopping, especially since my son is usually with me jumping up and down, begging for every single shrink wrapped toy dangling within his reach. But, today, […]

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The Corner Where Shame Meets Pain

It’s mid-July and the thermostat in my teaching trailer reads 85 degrees. Everything I am wearing—skirt, summer camp t-shirt, faded red espadrilles hiding unpainted toenails—is sticking to me and I haven’t even started teaching yet. I need to make a playlist. One that says, “I’m the cool new music teacher.” I lean over to open iTunes […]

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The 12 Days of Christmas for MOMS

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me: Alone time to read a f***ing book. On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me: Two gin and tonics and alone time to read a f***ing book. On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me: […]

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brittle

i am brittle the bones of this body will someday bow gently to silt i am brittle the blood of this body will someday loiter, resigned i am brittle the skin of this body will someday parch slowly without protest i am brittle i am i am brittle i am i am brittle, but i am not […]

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The Extensive Exam

March 23, 1995 New York City 2:25 p.m. At first I tried to push the thick, wooden door of the doctor’s office the way you push any door to exit a building, but it wouldn’t budge, so I turned and gave it a shove with my back and shoulder. It was then that I locked […]

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Just me?

Sometimes . . .  I hate being a mother.  And, I wonder if I am really cut out for it. What you just read—that confession—has been sitting in my drafts folder since March 2014. And now that I’ve said it, the urge to backspace and instead tell a fluffy little story about how much I […]

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Hide and Seek – A Microstory

The war was over. No more yelling or angry hands. Mommy said he was gone for good this time. She bought me a box of macaroni to celebrate; called me an arteest. This is all my fault. Please find her, officer.  I’m running out of glue.    

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On Fitting In

Do you know what it feels like to fit in?  It’s been on my mind a lot lately, especially as I’m about to start my second year of homeschooling my eight-year-old son. While the concept of ditching mainstream education has grown exponentially in the last ten years, being a homeschool parent still makes me seem a […]

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Room 157

A few nights ago, I had just turned off the light at the end of a long day and was looking forward to a good night’s sleep when my phone buzzed to let me know I had a Facebook notification. “Suzanne Frey Hawthorne has tagged you in a post.” Why is she tagging me at […]

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