Yesterday, I wrote about being raped, today I read this:

This story came up in my news feed this morning after reading the outpouring of support and encouragement from the readers of this blog regarding the story I wrote yesterday about being raped.  This article makes so many excellent points about what it is like to be a female victim of rape.  Please read it:

http://m.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/05/the-misguided-definition-of-rape-as-force/370954/

 

6 thoughts on “Yesterday, I wrote about being raped, today I read this:

  1. So poignant… I wish I knew what to say. All I have are these feelings.

    “a real woman confirms her weakness by proving it.”

    “even in my imagination, when I fight, I know I will probably lose.”

    I feel bitter.

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    1. Me too. I wish there was more we could do about this. I like to think I’m contributing positively by raising a boy who WILL KNOW how to take “no” for an answer and writing posts about what happened to me to help make a dent in the stigma and shame that come along with being a rape victim, but I still am left feeling like it’s not enough. Thank you for reading and commenting.

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  2. Thank you for posting this. While, of course, it was difficult to read, I think it is a valuable conversation to have – one that we need to continue to have as a society. While it is not explicitly stated, part of what I think needs to be considered is that people have either a fight or a flight response to most things. Most of us have heard of this. While society thinks that victims should fight, sometimes that is impossible or just not in their nature. Alternatively, their flight technique may be to disassociate because they are in shock, denial, etc. I don’t think this is so difficult to understand, but maybe if someone has not been in a life threatening position ever before in life, it is?

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    1. I agree. There is so much more conversation to be had on this topic–people’s shortsighted expectations about how victims “should” have dealt with the trauma, and are dealing with it post-trauma. Thanks for reading it and commenting.

      Like

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